Q: Why do Land Rovers have heated rear windows?
A: To keep your hands warm when you're pushing them.
Q: Whats the difference between a Kia and the principals office?
A: Its less embarrassing if your friends see you leaving the principals office.
Q: What goes on pages 4-5 of the Jeep user's manual?
A: The train and bus schedule.
A man goes to a parts garage:
Man: "Can I have a windshield wiper for a VW please?"
Parts man: "Yeah,that seems like a fair swap."
Q: How do you make a Rolls Royce leak oil?
A: Stick a Dodge badge onto it.
Q: What do you call a Freelander at the top of a hill?
A: A miracle.
Q: What do you call a Hyundai with dual exhausts?
A: A wheelbarrow.
Q: How do you double the value of a Discovery V8?
A: Half fill it with gas
Q: So you applied for a second bond?
A: Yes,my Merc needs a minor service.
Q: So BMW wasnt the first car on the scrap heap?
A: Nope,it was towed in by a NISSAN.
Q: What do you call an Explorer with brakes?
A: Customized
Q: What do you have to do if your Cherokee gets in the way of a swarm of killer bees?
A: Stop pushing and take refuge in the car.
Q: What is the Daewoo owners most ardent wish?
A: To buy a car.
Q: What do you call a Renault with a seat belt?
A: A rucksack.
Q: How do you make a Matiz (Chevy Aveo) go faster uphill?
A: Throw out the passenger.
Q: What do you call an Opel with a flat tire?
A: A write-off.
I hear you've got a new car - a Toyota!
Yes,I won the second prize in a lottery.
What was the first prize then?
A fruit basket.
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