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  1. #1
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    Talking Chuck Norris jokes

    Post your favorite Chuck Norris jokes

    Thanks to mooseweb for the thread idea
    What's your budget?

    Seriously, what's your budget?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
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    Chuck Norris actually died years ago. The grim reaper is just too scared to tell him.

    hahaha

  3. #3
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    I just found an awesome Chuck Norris jokes thread on a biking forum, of all places.

    Chuck Norris does not use spell check.

    If he happens to misspell a word, he simply changes the actual spelling of it.
    What's your budget?

    Seriously, what's your budget?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
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    149
    When Chuck Norris sells Unlimited WebHosting, he's not being deceptive.

    Chuck Norris can host the entire internet on a Pentium II with 32MB of RAM and a broken NIC card.

  5. #5
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    Haha poor Chuck people still make jokes about him.
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  6. #6
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    for secure PHP programming, always start your PHP code with the following line:
    PHP Code:
    require_once("Chuck.Norris"); 
    Everyone who tries to hack your website will be counter-hacked...
    Closed for winter...

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2001
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    Chicago, IL
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    Quote Originally Posted by The-Pixel View Post
    Haha poor Chuck people still make jokes about him.
    Chuck loves them. Dont you remember the mountain dew commercials from about 2 years ago with him?
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  8. #8
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    Don't forget to check the facts.. Just the facts Maam.


    http://chucknorrisfacts.com/
    My IP >> 127.0.0.1 Hack Away!!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
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    Hobbiton, The Shire
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    Chuck even uses them in articles he writes now <g>. Dude is awesome.

    --------

    Water boils faster when Chuck Norris watches it.

    Chuck Norris once played rock-paper-scissors in front of a mirror... He won. Twice.

    Chuck Norris does not wear a watch, he decides what time it is.

    Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.

    Chuck Norris is Luke Skywalker’s grandfather.

    If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can’t see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

  10. #10
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    Chuck Norris thinks asphalt is a butt disease..... stupid redneck.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by davidb View Post
    Chuck loves them. Dont you remember the mountain dew commercials from about 2 years ago with him?
    Hmmm I don't think I do. Oh, I'm sure he doesn't mind; all in good fun.
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  12. #12
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    Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg....
    My IP >> 127.0.0.1 Hack Away!!

  13. #13
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    I wanna see Chuck and Kimbo go at it

  14. #14
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    Chuck Norris uses a night light when he goes to bed, not because he's afraid of the dark, but because the dark's afraid of him

  15. #15
    Chuck Norris doesn't read books, he just stares them down until he gets the information he wants out of them.

  16. #16
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    Chuck norris can slam revolving doors.

  17. #17
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    Chicago
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    Corey Northcutt | Northcutt
    Competitive inbound marketing with a hosting industry competency.
    Social | Content | Optimization | Outreach

  18. #18
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    Thanks guys. you made my day!!! I cant stop laughing!!! karkakakaka
    If you're the smartest person in the room then you're in the wrong room

  19. #19
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    Jesus walked on water. Chuck Norris swam through land.

  20. #20
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    Awesome Chuck Norris jokes, please keep 'em coming
    What's your budget?

    Seriously, what's your budget?

  21. #21
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    Chuck Norris is supposedly pretty short.

    -mike
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  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mike - Limestone View Post
    Chuck Norris is supposedly pretty short.

    -mike

    Is that a joke or a statement? lol

  23. #23
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    A statement. Note the word "supposedly" - i.e. no one can measure Chuck as he is beyond our dimention. And those who tried to measure him ended their lives sidekicked.
    By the way, the world began from Chuck. At the begining, there was Chuck Norris.

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Location
    Australia
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    Goto Google
    Type find chuck norris in the search bar and press I'm Feeling Lucky
    I come from the land downunder

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