Results 1 to 12 of 12

Thread: Ever Wonder?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Glika Nera - Athens - Greece - Europe

    Talking Ever Wonder?

    Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

    Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

    Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

    Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

    Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

    Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?

    Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

    Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

    Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

    Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

    When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

    Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

    Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

    You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't
    they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

    Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

    Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

    If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

    If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

    In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity,
    here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

    On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( and that's the only time
    I have to work on my hair).

    On a bag of Fritos: ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.Details
    inside. (the shoplifter special)?

    On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would
    be how???....)

    On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's
    "just" a suggestion).

    On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."
    well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

    On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:"Product will be hot after heating." (...and you

    On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time)?

    On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery
    after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of
    construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

    On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." and...I'm taking this because???....)

    On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." as opposed to...what)?

    >On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."
    (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

    On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

    On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, Delta?)

    On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you
    to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

    [hint] We need a damn jokes forum [/hint]

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Minas Tirith
    LOL!! Thanks for posting!

    There is an island of opportunity in the middle of every difficulty. Miss the island, though, and you're pretty much doomed.

  3. #3

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2001
    Detroit, MI
    Why you park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?
    <!-- boo! -->

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Wee - that was... thought provoking

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2002
    thats mad..
    Quality Hosting Template For Sale! -

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Thats cool u made me smile, thanks

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Los Angeles, CA
    196 - Business Web Hosting, Reseller Hosting & Fast VPS Hosting Best India Web Hosting Provider. India Web Hosting
    Hosting Websites Since 2002 in USA, EU, India and all over the world

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    This forum officially ****ing sucks

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2002

    When I was in high school, someone someone did a whole coulum on this very thing...

    Heres some more...

    why police say "you are innocent till proven guilty" and they lock you up anyway?

    why police beat you up, shoot at ya' and get their dog, and when they put you in the car they say watch your head. - Gee, not like it matters now...
    Glioblastoma Multiforme (GBM) Brain Cancer Awareness. May is Brain Cancer awareness month. Gray Matters!
    Incurable, 6-18 months prognosis, survivors longer than 3 years less than 1% chance.
    Don't like what I say? Ignore me.

  11. #11
    haha - we needed a bit of humor here
    Santiago Yajan Cruz
    [://Insert ancient Chinese saying here ...]

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Glika Nera - Athens - Greece - Europe
    Originally posted by JamRover
    haha - we needed a bit of humor here
    Actually what we NEED is a JOKES FORUM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts