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  1. #1
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    May 2005
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    Unwanted guest staying at your house

    Hey,... just wanting a few ideas as to what to do in this situation.

    We have one of my partner's friends staying and it was initially only meant to be for 2-3 weeks while he got himself settled into our city (Sydney). As it happens it has now been about 8 weeks and we're starting to get to the end of our tether.

    He does pay rent, although not in equal proportion to the actual cost, but he constantly uses our cosmetic products, eats our food, has a bath virtually every day or second day, uses the clothes drier constantly, is noisy and just generally irritating

    We really want him to leave but he's quite difficult to confront - he turns everything back around on us and thinks he is perfect. For instance if we complain about him eating or using our stuff he goes on about us being stingy etc. We cannot afford to continually replace the things he uses (he doesn't even have his own shampoo).

    Has anyone else had this sort of situation before? I want to tell him he has to leave and give him about a week but I know it will end up in an argument, which I want to prevent. So any tactics or ways of approaching the situation would be much appreciated

  2. #2
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    "He does pay rent, although not in equal proportion to the actual cost, but he constantly uses our cosmetic products, eats our food, has a bath virtually every day or second day, uses the clothes drier constantly, is noisy and just generally irritating "

    Would you prefer he didn't bath every two days?

    //Got nothing else, best of luck with it though!
    David
    Web hosting by Fused For businesses with more important things to do than worry about their hosting.

  3. #3
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    Dec 2003
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    Something that has always worked for me.

    I ask a good friend who lives in the same town to "pretend" to be coming to town for a few days and needing a place to stay (of course the person staying me has never met this person). My friend packs his bags and I tell my unwelcomed guest that a friend is coming and that unfortunantely there isn't enough room for all of us, and that I had this planned for months now. Then just to add to the story, my friend stays over a day or two.

    Works for me.

  4. #4
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    Originally posted by David
    "He does pay rent, although not in equal proportion to the actual cost, but he constantly uses our cosmetic products, eats our food, has a bath virtually every day or second day, uses the clothes drier constantly, is noisy and just generally irritating "

    Would you prefer he didn't bath every two days?

    //Got nothing else, best of luck with it though!
    He showers every day, which is fine, but baths are expensive ...

  5. #5
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    May 2005
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    Originally posted by Rob83
    My friend packs his bags and I tell my unwelcomed guest that a friend is coming and that unfortunantely there isn't enough room for all of us, and that I had this planned for months now. Then just to add to the story, my friend stays over a day or two.
    I like the idea and will remember it for the future but unfortunately wouldn't work this time as there is the space if people do come and stay... just wish some family were coming over as it would need to be more than one person. Thanks tho

  6. #6
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    There is no substitute for honesty.

    "Listen, mate. When you came here it was to be on a temporary basis.
    The time has come for you to go. We are not a motel and we prefer to live alone as a family."

  7. #7
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    Originally posted by -T{H}R-
    I like the idea and will remember it for the future but unfortunately wouldn't work this time as there is the space if people do come and stay... just wish some family were coming over as it would need to be more than one person. Thanks tho
    why dont u just pretend family are comming over? he doesnt have to know

  8. #8
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    I'm more of the "you have three sayd to find another place" type. And on the third day, all his crap wouldn't be in the house. Or you can up his rent to more than his share (why not 100% heh).

    Of course, 'round these parts there are "renter's rights" and he may have a legal right to stay at your house, right to x-days notice (here it is 60 days I believe), etc.
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    Chicken

  9. #9
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    Originally posted by Chicken
    Of course, 'round these parts there are "renter's rights" and he may have a legal right to stay at your house, right to x-days notice (here it is 60 days I believe), etc.
    ie: Pacific Heights?

  10. #10
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    Originally posted by blue27
    There is no substitute for honesty.

    "Listen, mate. When you came here it was to be on a temporary basis.
    The time has come for you to go. We are not a motel and we prefer to live alone as a family."
    Yeah, I'm thinking that way ... because it is the honest truth - we do prefer our privacy and like most people, can only take some people in small doses.

    No such thing as renters right here. He's not really a renter anyway, just a boarder - an overstayer.

  11. #11
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    Don't get me wrong, I don't mind providing hospitality to people and am not finicky about letting them use my stuff for a while while they sort themselves out - but it's just gone on too long. He has enough money to return the favours and is just being disrespectful taking but not preparing to give anything back. And he's not a close friend - it's not as if it's family.

  12. #12
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    Originally posted by blue27
    ie: Pacific Heights?
    Not sure what ya' mean jelly bean.
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    Chicken

  13. #13
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    Originally posted by Chicken
    Not sure what ya' mean jelly bean.
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0100318/

  14. #14
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    Jun 2004
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    Boise, ID U.S.A.
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    You just have to be firm and say that you want him out because that's what you want. Since he's paying rent, you might have a contractual obligation to keep him for the period for which the rent is paid.
    If he refuses your request, you may need some professional legal advice. It may have to be specific for your location. Obviously you want to avoid expenses. Maybe some government agency can provide some free information. If not, maybe a lawyer can provide a half hour consultation for a fee that's not so bad.

  15. #15
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    Mar 2004
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    Change the locks and put his stuff in a storage unit.

  16. #16
    bobcares is offline [email protected]
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    Just point him to this thread... ;-)

    Amar
    A student once asked his teacher, "Master, what is enlightenment?"
    The master replied, "When hungry, eat. When tired, sleep. When you need care, come to bobcares...."

  17. #17
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    lol , good one

    i hope i dont fall into such case because i wouldn't accept rent nor let him pay a fils (kuwaiti version of cent )
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  18. #18
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    Aug 2002
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    I did used to have a person who lived with me. She would used up my body wash. She wouldn't take just a small part but rather 1/4 of the bottle each time.

  19. #19
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    ^^ I can relate to the above! A little goes a long way!

  20. #20
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    Dec 2000
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    The Woodlands, Tx
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    When he tries to turn stuff on you, turn it right back on him.

    Him "You are stingy"
    You "It's my stuff, I have the right to be stingy. What gives you the right to use it?"

    You've been here long enough, longer than supposed. Get the fuc& out now.

    I have kicked three people out of my house, and there indeed are renters rights here. However, ever try to deal with the courts while looking for shelter? There's the legal way, then there's the realistic way. I'm not a rich apartment complex, court will get you nowhere.

  21. #21
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    Do you have a girlfriend or a wife? If you do, nothing weirds out a house guest more than being woken up in the middle of the night to the sound of really loud sex.

  22. #22
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    Originally posted by mikeylove
    Do you have a girlfriend or a wife? If you do, nothing weirds out a house guest more than being woken up in the middle of the night to the sound of really loud sex.
    Or walking around the house naked when you have really bad gas

  23. #23
    Kick him to the curb, here as long as you dont have a contract, or mail coming to the address (basicly) you can kick him out ( usa ).

  24. #24
    Join Date
    May 2005
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    No contract at all. It was basically like a guest situation - where they stay for a brief period of time ... and after that we let it go a little longer while he got a job but said he had to contribute some money. But it's gone on far too long.

  25. #25
    Annoy him to the point that he is begging to leave.......have a good stereo and start playing "Staying Alive" all night while singing all night long. Put some ground up insulation in his sheets and watch him squirm. Put some stuff in the shampoo to make his hair fall out. Add some stuff to his food to make him constantly be sick.

    Or you could just ask him to politely leave

  26. #26
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
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    Originally posted by blue27
    There is no substitute for honesty.

    "Listen, mate. When you came here it was to be on a temporary basis.
    The time has come for you to go. We are not a motel and we prefer to live alone as a family."

    Yep i agree with blue be upfront and tell him, give him a hard and fast date to leave then stick to it even if he refuses to look for a place just chuck his stuff out and change the locks if you have to......

  27. #27
    Join Date
    May 2005
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    Right, well I'm off home now... here goes!

    Wish me luck!

    I'll let you know how it went

  28. #28
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
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    Originally posted by phill2003
    Yep i agree with blue be upfront and tell him, give him a hard and fast date to leave then stick to it even if he refuses to look for a place just chuck his stuff out and change the locks if you have to......
    Or do the above but also give him the address of a hostel in your area. If he refuses to look for a place, move his stuff to the hostel on the day of the deadline and maybe pay for his first night. Tape a note to your door with the address of the hostel, a bus ticket, and an explanation that he'll find his things there.

    Hospitality is one thing, but some people go through their lives leeching off of other people one way or another.

    Lois
    Do you have a WHT question or concern? Please open a helpdesk ticket.

    "Do what you can, where you are, with what you have." Theodore Roosevelt

  29. #29
    Join Date
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    ^^ Thanks for your contribution, I like that idea... and agree with the leeching part.

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