Page 1 of 5 1234 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 117
  1. #1

    Lets say you really like your best friends girlfriend....

    What would you do? Lets say these two people are your best friends. You see them both pretty much every day. Lets say you spend a lot of time with the girl since she is off work before the boyfriend. You do almost everything together. You like her so much that the thought of going out and dating some other girl pretty much never comes to mind and when it does you think nothing of it. You do pretty much everything together with this girl, from hanging out to grocery shopping and think of her 24/7. They have been dating about three years and live together. Lets say it breaks your heart seeing them so happy together because you wish more than anything in the world that you could be him even just for a second. You have everything in common with her, this is why you got so close with her so fast. You are pretty much the same person as she is. You like the exact same music, tv shows, music, food, ect. You know she is 100% comfortable since you have fallen asleep together many times watching movies. You CAN'T say anything about this to anyone since you don't want to lose your best friend and you don't know what would become of the girl. What would you do?
      0 Not allowed!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Tas, Australia
    Posts
    2,487
    Dunk my head into cold water and remind myself of the situation
    New site: www.talkutas.com
      0 Not allowed!

  3. #3
    Can't say that I tried that one yet
      0 Not allowed!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    9,851
    I'm not sure what you are looking for here but if you even have thoughts of making a move on this girl then you are no friend at all.
      0 Not allowed!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Fairfax, Virginia
    Posts
    6,834
    Well, unless you want to keep feeling these repressed thoughts, you're going to have tell both of them. It's pretty simple, really. You might lose one or both of them as friends, but at least then you've done all you can to make your position known. Perhaps she'll like you better, anyhow. Maybe she just thought you weren't interested in her romantically, so she never said or did anything.
      0 Not allowed!

  6. #6
    Originally posted by blue27
    I'm not sure what you are looking for here but if you even have thoughts of making a move on this girl then you are no friend at all.
    I'm not planning and will never make any moves at all. Just feel like getting some thoughts off my chest and/or get other peoples thoughts
      0 Not allowed!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    FT Worth, TX
    Posts
    5,096
    What your describing is what most people on cheaters end up on television because your friend trusts you with his girlfriend. I certainly wouldn't want to be responsible for breaking up a 3 year relationship especially since they've been living together for that long. I can only say that you go out and find another girl who shares the same interests as you. I really like my friend alot and if she were single i'd ask her out, but since she has a boyfriend its a no go for me unless they were to break up.
    Kerry Jones
      0 Not allowed!

  8. #8
    We hang out together so much that people have been spreading around we are sleeping together on the side.
      0 Not allowed!

  9. #9
    Originally posted by Kerry Jones
    What your describing is what most people on cheaters end up on television because your friend trusts you with his girlfriend. I certainly wouldn't want to be responsible for breaking up a 3 year relationship especially since they've been living together for that long. I can only say that you go out and find another girl who shares the same interests as you. I really like my friend alot and if she were single i'd ask her out, but since she has a boyfriend its a no go for me unless they were to break up.
    exactly. I would be disgusted with myself if I broke them up. I would feel bad asking her out even if they broke up by themselves
      0 Not allowed!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    FT Worth, TX
    Posts
    5,096
    well it would be ok if they were to break up, but its always honorable to ask your friend first before asking her out. I had to do the same with one of my friends before asking his old ex out.

    in simple terms... its just courtesty and respect.
    Kerry Jones
      0 Not allowed!

  11. #11
    I just want to clear this up for everyone. I AM NOT GOING TO MAKE A MOVE TO BREAK UP THEIR RELATIONSHIP. Please understand that everyone. I would be a horrible friend if I was to do this and would never be able to look at myself again.
      0 Not allowed!

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Fairfax, Virginia
    Posts
    6,834
    Originally posted by Jake721
    We hang out together so much that people have been spreading around we are sleeping together on the side.
    Well, to rephrase what I said before, if you don't want to ruin your relationship with your [male] friend, I think your best bet would be to start hanging out with different people. It's very painful to like somebody romantically and to hang out with them so often, if they're not interested in you that way at all or if you have social restrictions like the ones you're describing. Sometimes, that's just how things work out. I don't know how much you want to go on hanging out with this girl just as a friend if your feelings extend beyond the boundaries of a friendship, and you certainly don't want to find yourself in a potentially "questionable" situation.
      0 Not allowed!

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Fairfax, Virginia
    Posts
    6,834
    Originally posted by Jake721
    I would be a horrible friend if I was to do this and would never be able to look at myself again.
    There's a cure for that: get rid of all your mirrors.
      0 Not allowed!

  14. #14
    Originally posted by SniperDevil
    Well, to rephrase what I said before, if you don't want to ruin your relationship with your [male] friend, I think your best bet would be to start hanging out with different people. It's very painful to like somebody romantically and to hang out with them so often, if they're not interested in you that way at all or if you have social restrictions like the ones you're describing. Sometimes, that's just how things work out. I don't know how much you want to go on hanging out with this girl just as a friend if your feelings extend beyond the boundaries of a friendship, and you certainly don't want to find yourself in a potentially "questionable" situation.
    Tried this. It only flew for less than a week. She was always asking me to go out somewhere and I really did miss her a lot. We always have a lot of fun together.
      0 Not allowed!

  15. #15
    Originally posted by SniperDevil
    There's a cure for that: get rid of all your mirrors.
    hahahaha
      0 Not allowed!

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    FT Worth, TX
    Posts
    5,096
    Well, to rephrase what I said before, if you don't want to ruin your relationship with your [male] friend, I think your best bet would be to start hanging out with different people.
    The problem with this SniperDevil is if you decide to avoid your friends whats the point of having them as your buddies? It just really requires self control over the situation like I do with my friend.

    The only way your going to cure this is by finding a girlfriend that has alot in common with you and once you fall in love you won't have to worry about this at all. I'm sure there is plenty of single women in your area that have common interests with you.
    Kerry Jones
      0 Not allowed!

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    New York, NY
    Posts
    10,710
    gah..

    I hate these situations....
    MediaLayer, LLC - www.medialayer.com Learn how we can make your website load faster, translating to better conversion rates for your business!
    The pioneers of optimized web hosting, featuring LiteSpeed Web Server & SSD Storage - Celebrating 10 Years in Business
      0 Not allowed!

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Fairfax, Virginia
    Posts
    6,834
    Originally posted by Jake721
    Tried this. It only flew for less than a week. She was always asking me to go out somewhere and I really did miss her a lot. We always have a lot of fun together.
    Why don't you tell her your feelings then??? Jeez, man, get it over with, because sooner or later, something's going to happen. I won't elaborate, because I have no idea what this "something" will be, but something will happen that will obstruct or promote your relationship(s).
      0 Not allowed!

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    FT Worth, TX
    Posts
    5,096
    Why don't you tell her your feelings then??? Jeez, man, get it over with, because sooner or later, something's going to happen. I won't elaborate, because I have no idea what this "something" will be, but something will happen that will obstruct or promote your relationship(s).
    bad idea sniper because we don't know how the friend would react about this or it could indeed cause a breakup between the two.
    Kerry Jones
      0 Not allowed!

  20. #20
    Originally posted by Kerry Jones
    bad idea sniper because we don't know how the friend would react about this or it could indeed cause a breakup between the two.
    I'm pretty sure all three of us would not be as close of friends. The other two may even fall apart a little. I'm not sure what would happen if I was to spill the beans to be honest
      0 Not allowed!

  21. #21
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Fairfax, Virginia
    Posts
    6,834
    Originally posted by Kerry Jones
    bad idea sniper because we don't know how the friend would react about this or it could indeed cause a breakup between the two.
    Well, I can't logically see why the friend would mind if Jake was open with him about his feelings for his friend's girlfriend. You can't control or change your feelings; feelings are feelings, and unless you understand that, you're going to get ticked off at just about anything someone feels or says. He should tell him tactfully, but frankly, that he has feelings for his girlfriend, but that he won't do anything questionable with her. If he must, he may have to dissolve his friendship with the girl, but in my experience, when I've had feelings for a girl, I've always wanted to say something.
      0 Not allowed!

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    424
    Most people are shallow, just be like everyone else. if your young go ahead and go for it, you can find another friend. but some people must be offended at that. So dont do that.


    yes yes, flame on.
      0 Not allowed!

  23. #23
    Originally posted by 3rdcoast
    Most people are shallow, just be like everyone else. if your young go ahead and go for it, you can find another friend. but some people must be offended at that. So dont do that.


    yes yes, flame on.
    I would kick my own *** if I was to follow this. I wouldn't even have to let my friend take care of that
      0 Not allowed!

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Proud She-Geek
    Posts
    1,723
    Well, Jake, I guess my first question is do you think she feels the same for you? Has she given you any indication (serious flirting, etc)?

    This is a tough situation, no doubt about it. I feel for you; I know how hard it is to want someone you can't have. I was in a similar situation except I was the one already involved with another. Some days you just feel like tearing your hair out, but (in my case) in the end all I could do was tell myself over and over that if it was meant to be between us it would eventually happen. It really took a lot of pressure off me and helped me relax.

    FYI we did date briefly after my ex-bf and I broke up but then he (the new bf) went off to college and we just sort of reverted back to being good friends.

    Good luck to you; I hope one way or another you're able to find happiness!
    <?php echo "Signature here"; ?>
      0 Not allowed!

  25. #25
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Toronto, ON
    Posts
    3,446
    Well it's not right to make a move now, if and only if they brake up then make sure you're around. You're like a shark smelling an open wound, you attack as soon as you smell it.

    May I ask you how old you two are ? If you guys are young then I'm pretty sure that relationship with your friend won't last forever so you just have to be patient.
    Jean-Pierre Abboud / I'm the TekGURU
    www.Gotekky.com / Managed hosting solutions / AS63447
    Web Hosting, VPS Hosting, Dedicated Servers
      0 Not allowed!

Page 1 of 5 1234 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •