I'm hosting a client with gigenet and while they're great, once a day we prefer to reboot the VPS. this takes approximately 10-12 mins before all services are back online. During this time, users are unable to find the server and they see an error till its back (obviously).
I'm wondering if its possible to setup some sort of maintenance page the instantly comes online the second the server goes down for any reason whatsoever... reboot, downtime etc...
the ram tends to clog up because the site is intensive & resource heavy
This doesn't sound right - either you're mistaking cache for used ram or you have a mem leak problem. If it's the latter you should really get that fixed, if it's the first you really shouldn't do that. Try free -m is my advice.
If that confirms your theory invest time in somebody who knows how to use valgrind et al.