hey

today my mom was asking me to get married but i said i am too busy supporting my customers ;) and i am too young for all this.

but, seriously i got into thinking, if i have to do arrange marriage then what should i look in a girl, based upon she can be my wife.

can you suggest ! :rolleyes:

Looks good
Cooks good

doesnt drink beer... can drive you home when ur drunk... can clean :P all those meanial tasks :P

someone with a sense of humor that also has similar goals in life and similar morals to you.

Also, someone who has had a similar background as you would help, especially in culture.

how can one confirm she cooks good.

A wife of my friend who claimed to be good cook before marriage, actually she used to cook food with her friend when she invited him for dinner and took all the credits.

Now he complains she is damn bad cook.

Originally posted by mahinder
if i have to do arrange marriage then what should i look in a girl, based upon she can be my wife. Are you saying if you were to 'arrange' a marriage, or if you are to have an arranged marriage? If it's an arranged marriage then you wouldn't really have much say in who you are to marry.

But generally speaking, someone that you can easily get along with, honest, good personality, encouraging, and supportive.

Ask around and then get her to cook for you on her own, that way you will get some idea.

Grandma and me have been together for over 35 years and as you can see she looks good - cooks good as well.

Originally posted by mahinder
hey

today my mom was asking me to get married but i said i am too busy supporting my customers ;) and i am too young for all this.

but, seriously i got into thinking, if i have to do arrange marriage then what should i look in a girl, based upon she can be my wife.

can you suggest ! :rolleyes:

Wait, wait wait ...first find a woman, then when you really know her (at least 2 years) think about marriage.

Originally posted by mahinder

today my mom was asking me to get married


Do you think that you've overstayed your welcome? :D

mahinder, so we have an idea of your background for reference, what is your culture, if you don't mind my question?

Just DON'T DO IT!

Originally posted by skelley1
mahinder, so we have an idea of your background for reference, what is your culture, if you don't mind my question?

well, actually I am from Bombay - India, its a little bit conservative society here and girls don't keep relationships with boys openly and its not acceptable by parents to date girls before marriage.

Hey my neighbor is from Goa and she makes the most amazing curry chicken I've had in my life! Her daughter is a beautiful girl (US citizen as her dad is American) and she's almost 6 feet tall !

You'd have to wait though another 4 years before she turns 18 :D

Originally posted by mahinder
. . . . . . what should i look in a girl, based upon she can be my wife.

can you suggest ! :rolleyes: Just look away. Marriage is overrated.

Don't get me wrong . . . . . . I been happily married . . . . . . FOUR times. :rolleyes:

Originally posted by SoftWareRevue
Just look away. Marriage is overrated.

Don't get me wrong . . . . . . I been happily married . . . . . . FOUR times. :rolleyes:

lol...:D

make sure you are happy with yourself before you try to make someone else happy mahinder. That is a key most people never get.

no reference to you SWR ;)

You should be in agreement on the basics of living and lifestyle. Religion, children, finances, household chores etc. You will find more discord over how to handle money, who should be responsible for daily routine chores, how to discipline children and such more than almost anything else.

It also helps to have a similar body clock (don't marry a day person if you are a night person) and similar comfort zone for heating and cooling your house.

Try to make sure her bad habits are ones you can live with. And make sure she can live with your bad habits as well. ;)

If you need to check out her cooking skills, help her out in the kitchen while she is cooking a meal. That way SHE can see if you are worth a flip at helping out too. :D

Hiccups is a cunning man with a plan :D

hmmm, so how many times has hiccups been married?
To be that knowlegeable he'd have to either be a psychologist or married at least a couple of times.

Originally posted by ATST
hmmm, so how many times has hiccups been married?
To be that knowlegeable he'd have to either be a psychologist or married at least a couple of times.

I don't know, but he must have been talking to my wife :D

money and kids are the biggest arguments.

also keep in mind those things you do that they say are 'cute' are exactly the same things they will nag you about years later.

also keep in mind an old addage my dad taught me:

Men fall in love with women for who they are. Women fall in love with men for who they could be.

Men and women also have preconceived notions (usually subconscious) of what a husband and a wife should be like, and that notion is not always accurate, healthy, or possible.

Also, you can't go wrong with being an American GI and marry an obedient Japanese geisha :D

Oops wait, the WWII is over.

Basically as Marc stated... Find women you like, and get to know her for 2-3 years, etc.
Edit: Fixed ;).

yes, the keyword is *WOMEN* I quite agree :D

I recommend taking advice form Jimmy Soul:

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

A pretty woman makes her husband look small
And very often causes his downfall
As soon as he married her and then she starts
To do the things that will break his heart

But if you make an ugly woman your wife
A-you'll be happy for the rest of your life
An ug-a-ly woman cooks meals on time
And she'll always give you peace of mind

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

Don't let your friends say you have no taste
Go ahead and marry anyway
Though her face is ugly,
Her eyes don't match
Take it from me
She's a better catch

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you


Say man!
Hey baby!
I saw your wife the other day!
Yeah?
Yeah, an' she's ug-leeee!
Yeah, she's ugly, but she sure can cook, baby!
Yeah, alright!

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

uualan I hope your wife doesn't read WHT :D:D:D

LOL
Hiccups is a woman. She has been married to her first husband for a very long time. (And hubby loves it when she calls him her 'first husband'. HA HA HA)

OK so Hiccups is a cunning woman with a plan then :D

Originally posted by mahinder
but, seriously i got into thinking, if i have to do arrange marriage then what should i look in a girl, based upon she can be my wife.

Well, I don't know about you, but I'm looking for someone
* female,
* age 20-22,
* trained as a classical musician (preferably violin),
* Intending to obtain at least a masters degree (preferably a doctorate) in mathematics (preferably), science, law, or medicine, and
* rhetorically inclined.

Hmm, I wonder why I'm still single...

arranged marriages suck, and id never let it happen to me.

Originally posted by clocker1996
arranged marriages suck, and id never let it happen to me.

Of course you will. Your marriage will just be arranged by different environmental factors than parents :D.

Originally posted by uuallan


Of course you will. Your marriage will just be arranged by different environmental factors than parents :D.

Such as, marrying a WWF.org or Greenpeace activist :D

Just remember one thing my friend.

Women are like parking scpace, good ones are taken and the rest are handicap.:cartman:

I like your sig, Mesum :)

BTW thanks for the Maxtor pointer, got my HD and it flies - sent off the rebate as well.

Hey hiccups, is your hubby Rock? ;)

Originally posted by skelley1


make sure you are happy with yourself before you try to make someone else happy mahinder. That is a key most people never get.



hello skelley1,

whats the point here, i really don't understand !!

after routine work life sucks without gfs, and at present I don't have any. Colleges are complete hence no more kids like friends, everybody is busy in their life's. Am i happy now, i guess, no.

Ahhhh, the true essence of marriage:

http://www.seanmorey.com/mansong.html

Make sure your speakers are on... :D

Vito

Originally posted by Hiccups
You should be in agreement on the basics of living and lifestyle. Religion, children, finances, household chores etc. You will find more discord over how to handle money, who should be responsible for daily routine chores, how to discipline children and such more than almost anything else.

It also helps to have a similar body clock (don't marry a day person if you are a night person) and similar comfort zone for heating and cooling your house.

Try to make sure her bad habits are ones you can live with. And make sure she can live with your bad habits as well. ;)

If you need to check out her cooking skills, help her out in the kitchen while she is cooking a meal. That way SHE can see if you are worth a flip at helping out too. :D

All this sounds good, but it cold take years to find out the true. By the time you are not blind any more, 3 or 4 years are gonne by. I sugrest get merried quickly. That will help you know each other in a matter of months. I did it and never regret it since.

Differences are good. They will prevent you from getting borred. Myu lady and I are not the most compatible people in the world, but that just makes it more fun. After 7 years we still do not know who handles money and such. Each other's bad habbits are annoying enough to have an occassional argument abot them, but at least that keeps us away from arguing about important stuff. I am night person, and she is day person, which guarantees both of us that we will have some private time for ourselvs every day. I read a saying somewhere: "Drink togather, but never from the same cup."

Originally posted by mahinder


hello skelley1,

whats the point here, i really don't understand !!

after routine work life sucks without gfs, and at present I don't have any. Colleges are complete hence no more kids like friends, everybody is busy in their life's. Am i happy now, i guess, no.

My point is that unless you are fully comfortable with who you are, you will not allow yourself to 'be yourself' around someone else and will be living a lie with them. The other person is not relevant. No one will make you happy in this case. There are many other reasons why being happy with yourself is important in life, and relationships, too.

It is the same in reverse. You will be happier with someone who is happy with themself. Someone who can be without you but would prefer to be with you. Someone who can make decisions on her own, but would prefer to decide with you. If you or they are not comfortable with their own person, then they run the risk of either becoming too dependant on you, or never getting close to you (or you with them). This will not be a healthy relationship.

Just because someone desires to be with someone does not mean they are ready. How many people do you know in life that are in their 30's and wish they had never married when they were 18? I know of several. All but one couple like this I might add. Of course some people may get lucky, but just desire is not enough to ensure a healthy, happy relationship with someone.

Think of the reasons you want to be married, other than you are lonely. What are you missing? What things are you looking for in someone else? A good match will be a good balance of helping you to become a complete person, and emphasizing the things about you that you like in yourself. If you cannot be comfortable on your own, then you will become dependant on them and problems will arise. If you are insecure and are TOO comfortable (as a defense mechanism) with yourself, you will never allow yourself to become close to the other person, and problems will again, arise.

I probably made you more confused than my original statement, but this is what I meant. :)

Originally posted by skelley1


lol...:D

make sure you are happy with yourself before you try to make someone else happy mahinder. That is a key most people never get.

no reference to you SWR ;)

Or as I posted in the Crazy Quotes thread:

"To truly love another you must learn to love yourself first ...and it wouldn't hurt to wash your hands inbetween."

;)

on marriage....make sure she will speak up when she disagrees with you and that communication is open...else you're liable to be dealing with a back-door man before long!

Also---I'd say its important that she doesn't have kids on the brain right away...that can cause problems too IM oh so HO

what to look in a wife ?


$$$$$$$$$$$ Deep Pockets $$$$$$$$$$$$:D

Simply date some nice girls untill you fall in love, it will become obvious when you find the right one.

It worked for me :)

Awwwwwwwww:love: :love: :love: :love: :love:

Originally posted by skelley1


My point is that unless you are fully comfortable with who you are, you will not allow yourself to 'be yourself' around someone else and will be living a lie with them. The other person is not relevant. No one will make you happy in this case. There are many other reasons why being happy with yourself is important in life, and relationships, too.

It is the same in reverse. You will be happier with someone who is happy with themself. Someone who can be without you but would prefer to be with you. Someone who can make decisions on her own, but would prefer to decide with you. If you or they are not comfortable with their own person, then they run the risk of either becoming too dependant on you, or never getting close to you (or you with them). This will not be a healthy relationship.

Just because someone desires to be with someone does not mean they are ready. How many people do you know in life that are in their 30's and wish they had never married when they were 18? I know of several. All but one couple like this I might add. Of course some people may get lucky, but just desire is not enough to ensure a healthy, happy relationship with someone.

Think of the reasons you want to be married, other than you are lonely. What are you missing? What things are you looking for in someone else? A good match will be a good balance of helping you to become a complete person, and emphasizing the things about you that you like in yourself. If you cannot be comfortable on your own, then you will become dependant on them and problems will arise. If you are insecure and are TOO comfortable (as a defense mechanism) with yourself, you will never allow yourself to become close to the other person, and problems will again, arise.

I probably made you more confused than my original statement, but this is what I meant. :)

hey skelley1,

you are the man, i will cut and paste your reply for future references. :)

Ok I haven't read other replies so I hope I'm not just repeating others sentiments.

1. She needs to be able to keep her mouth shut.
2. Don't pick a good looking women ... less competition.
3. Take a good long look at her mother .. that's what she will end up like.
4. Find someone you can be a friend with. This is most important.
5. Someone that is willing to live a long distance away from her family.
6. Someone that is willing to get there hands dirty helping you do whatever ... digging the garden, fixing the car etc.
7. Lastly don't listen to me I have a bad track record ... married three times live with seven others.

Doc

Go rich and ugly.. That way you can go play golf everyday and don't have to worry about her seeking out another man. Just rent a G-4 or if she is really weathly a G-5 and play in a different country every week :).