Sick of having customers? Not anymore! Spurvus will gladly take all of your customers, under the condition that they agree to move, they switch to one of OUR plans on OUR servers, and we do not have to pay you any money at all. Also, I get to decide, for each and every customer you offer, if I want to take them or not. Please PM me if interested.

Do NOT send me your "bad" customers!
I just want unwanted ones. Chances of me taking your unwanted customer increases if you tell me why you want to get rid of them.

Gosh what a great deal.. I will have to think about this.. I earn paying customers and give them to you for free? Wow why didn't anyone think of this before??

Great plan.

:eek:

Originally posted by GWDGuy
Great plan.

Thanks! :)

Originally posted by appletreats
. . . . . . . . . I just want unwanted ones. Chances of me taking your unwanted customer increases if you tell me why you want to get rid of them. :eek: Are you the one that stopped on Live Chat the other night and wanted to talk to our "Unruly Customers?" :mad:

Originally posted by SoftWareRevue
:eek: Are you the one that stopped on Live Chat the other night and wanted to talk to our "Unruly Customers?" :mad:

Of course not! As far as I know I do not know where your website is!

Please, do not polute my kind and serious offer with such accusations! :angry:

<NVM>

Originally posted by phpcoder
I just bought a corvette, do any of you guys want it for FREE? :eek:

This is about customers, not cars. You've come to the wrong place.

EDIT: I see you've corrected yourself. Good job! :love:

Only a fool would pass up this offer.

Please post your shipping address and I'll FedEx them over right away. My only question is, how many air holes should I drill in the box?

What I was trying to imply is that you have a 99.9% chance that nobody is going to give you ANY clients for free. Its like saving up for a corvette, using it a little, and then just giving it away... you loose alot of money. Who would just give away clients. If you are a serious buisness then why don't you buy them? What is your website?

No offense, but I wouldn't be hosted by a company that asks people for free clients. :o

From what I've heard, the asking for unwanted customers only enhances the ability for Spurvus to provide "no running away guarantee". They will not run away with your money.

Originally posted by phpcoder
What I was trying to imply is that you have a 99.9% chance that nobody is going to give you ANY clients for free. Its like saving up for a corvette, using it a little, and then just giving it away... you loose alot of money. Who would just give away clients. If you are a serious buisness then why don't you buy them? What is your website?

No offense, but I wouldn't be hosted by a company that asks people for free clients. :o

Well, a 00.1% chance is better than none. That corvette - what if the person is feeling generous? As for buying them, are you kidding? It's much cheaper to just get them free, my wo|man! My website is clearly shown if you click the "www" button in my posts.

And why not be hosted? It's quality hosting at an affordable price.

W/E this is totally stupid in my opinion. Tell me how many free clients you get in the end.

He's only asking for the unwanted customers. :rolleyes:

Originally posted by dside443
From what I've heard, the asking for unwanted customers only enhances the ability for Spurvus to provide "no running away guarantee". They will not run away with your money.

Q: How do I know that you will not take my money and run?
A: This is because of our innovative "No Running" guarantee. Spurvus Web Hosting guarantees that we will not take your money and run. We will not even walk. We will take your money, and then provide you with all of the quality web-hosting goodness you paid for. 100% of it! Guaranteed! Due to innovative guarantee!

Originally posted by SoftWareRevue
He's only asking for the unwanted customers. :rolleyes:


Only unwanted customers? Ok... next time I catch a spammer I'll know where to send him ;)

Jay, I have to say, that's the cleverest line I have read. :)

Couldn't think of anything better to say.

Peter

Originally posted by FDrive
Only unwanted customers? Ok... next time I catch a spammer I'll know where to send him ;)

Just remember, I get to choose who I get and who I don't.


NOBODY has given me a serious offer. Come on, guys!

Originally posted by phpcoder
W/E this is totally stupid in my opinion. Tell me how many free clients you get in the end.

Okay.

Please tell me, appletreats, why would anyone goes through the trouble of giving you any offer?

You are not offering any type of compensation, and you even get to pick. That means hosts can't even send you spammers for fun. On the other hand, they have to spend time working with you.

The best thing a host would do to an unwanted client is to simply terminate the account. I don't see why anyone would go through the hassle just so you can have a new client (or the unwanted the client could have a new host.)

If I am missing something here, I would love to hear that.

Peter

I guess we are just stupid and must be missing out on this great offer you are giving us.. Hmmmm Let's see we pay for advertising, we sell the customer and then we give them to you for free and we get screwed without the comfort of KY or anything..... Damn I am surpised there is not a line of people ready to give you all their clients.. Nothing like getting screwed with sandpaper.

These are the kind of posts that should be deleted before they get started or better yes Mr Chicken should add a whole new forum..

The topic would be "Fraud, stupidity and other nonsense"

:rolleyes:

Originally posted by appletreats


Of course not! As far as I know I do not know where your website is!

Please, do not polute my kind and serious offer with such accusations! :angry: :eek2: Strange. The person on Live Chat signed in with the username applesheets. :rolleyes:

Coincidence??? :angry:

This has to be a joke and I won't be gullible enough to reply with "this is stupid".... unless...

... you are not joking, in which case you are an absolute moron who should not be operating any type of business.

I've got 500 customers that I've spent the last year attracting. They always pay on time, and never submit ANY support tickets.

They're the perfect customers. Oh, did I mention they each pay me $200 per month?

Do you want them? If so, they're yours.. FREE!

Just send me $20,000 to cover the cost of shipping...

Originally posted by Derek
This has to be a joke

Yeah, I guess it is.

Hey Appletreats,

We (Voxtreme) have got one very unwanted client, he does nothing but moan at every single thing that goes wrong.
He really gets on my nerves sometimes.

Anyway if you want him, you can have him !!
In fact I think you might already know him :D

Originally posted by vox-fred
We (Voxtreme) have got one very unwanted client, he does nothing but moan at every single thing that goes wrong.
He really gets on my nerves sometimes.

Anyway if you want him, you can have him !!
In fact I think you might already know him :D

That's too bad!
But only want happy clients!
;)

If this is a joke, you should post it in the lounge forum.

Peter

Originally posted by ckpeter
If this is a joke, you should post it in the lounge forum.

Peter

It was semi-serious in the beginning, but all the crazy "u r a moron" people made it into a joke. I'm still willing to take offers.

Even being semi-serious makes you stupid. Noone will give you hard earned clients.

It's amazing how a little tongue-in-cheek can get so many people so upset so easily.

My suggestion: Switch to decaf?...

Vito

Originally posted by vito
It's amazing how a little tongue-in-cheek can get so many people so upset so easily.

My suggestion: Switch to decaf?...

Vito
You don't seems to realize how inappropriate the context is, do you?

Jokes are fine, but within the advertisement forums, people are trying to conduct business in a serious manner. Granted, a little joke doesn't hurt, but this whole thread is a joke, thus it belongs in the lounge forum.

Besides, right now I am not sure what exactly he means by "semi-serious". Either way, it offends people. If it is serious, this shows how he is insulting the intelligence of the readers, and if this is non-serious, it shows how inappropriate it is by being in the advertisement instead of in the lounge forum.

Peter

...Either way, it offends people. If it is serious, this shows how he is insulting the intelligence of the readers, ...

Wow, this actually offends you??

While I realize that appletreats could probably have picked a better forum for this thread, I think perhaps the "serious" workplace could at times be tempered with a little humor.

There's a very successful airline company in Canada where their unofficial motto is "If you're not having fun, you're fired..." Words to live by...

Personally, I found the thread amusing. Then again, I've always enjoyed appletreats' brand of humor. Then again, what do I know? He could be totally serious this time!! :eek: :eek: :eek:

Vito

I'll bet he 'would' take your unwanted customers though.

So, I too, "fail to realize how inappropriate the context is."

If I had customers I didn't want, I would surely take him up on his offer. And you can't blame him for stating that he is "semi-serious" after all the bashing he's had to endure.

If the title of the thread bothers you; don't click it.
If the first post bothers you; don't read further.
If the entire thread appears inappropriate to you; don't return to it. Just report it to the moderators and let them decide what is appropriate or not.

Amen.

No no no, SWR and Vito, you are both missing my point.

I don't have a problem with it being either serious or non-serious.

If it is serious, I will participate in the discussion about how sound/unsound his business model. In this case also, this thread is entirely appropriate within the context of the advertisement forum (no matter how stupid I think it is, it is still a "serious offer").

If it is non-serious, I don't have a problem either. All I ask (he asks, or I will report, anyway it takes) is that the thread be moved to the lounge forum, because such an interesting thread should be discussed in the lounge.

The only issue is when appletreats classifies it as "semi-serious" that I have a problem. Basically, I am confused about how to treat it using either of the attitude I mentioned above. I don't joke on serious offer, and I don't try to raise a philosophical discussion on a joke. In this case, it is neither.

I think what needs to be done is that this thread should either be moved to the lounge forum with a good laugh, or if it is serious, it should be treated with disucssion such as those of the "unlimited bandwidth."

I didn't report to the moderator precisely because I can't figure out whether it is serious or not. I feel like the moderators don't have a right on appletreats' thread; he should be the deciding if the offer is serious or not, and the moderators (indeed, us) can take appropriate action.

Peter

Darn, only thing that saddens me is that I am not the first one to reply "take it easy, ckpeter! no lives were lost, here...".

Guys, this is ONE thread -apparently Appletreats posts a thread of this kind every other week- whose author's intent is to make business and not take it too seriously.

I mean, think about it: how many web hosts do you know on this very board, just start their business without giving it too much thought, and now they have, maybe, 10 clients or so and they're growing tired of it, and there's very little chance they'll find anyone who want to buy these clients. They know it and all they're looking for a way out without getting a bad reputation.

I think Appletreat's offer is perfect for these guys, come on let's not be hypocritical and pretend that everyone around here is a professionnal with more than a couple clients.

In conclusion I perfectly understand his "semi-serious" stance just as I understood it with his previous offer.

ckpeter, are you that scared that this will give a bad image of WHT or something..? Come on, chill out, man.

The whole thing started as a unique ploy to gain customers. Doesn't matter if it's stupid or not. He tried and now knows what he did won't work.

I'm sure ALL of us have thought of a "brilliant" idea only to wonder what we were thinking coming up with the idea...

OMG. I go out for a three hour bike ride and come back to this. Yes, I really would take your unwanted customers, as long as they weren't spamming or being abusive, or violating your ToS or something awful like that. So I am serious! I do want your unwanted customers! I'm sure that there are people out there who have: unwanted customers. And I want them. More customers for me!

I have enjoyed cyansmoker and aragon's previous posts. Also vito and swr and any others. They say what I want to better than I can.

this post should have started with omfg

I made this post because, hey, you never know who might be willing to give up some customers. Maybe I could get some!

And GWDGuy and Derek. I'll tell YOU what's inappropiate! I do NOT like is all these people coming in here bashing not only my offer, and my company, but me personally. If you MUST pollute my offer, it's NOT acceptable to attack me personally. I don't know about you, but I do NOT appreciate being called a "moron", or being called "stupid". What were you THINKING?!

As for ckpeter, calm DOWN man. What are you, the WHT Undercover ModSquad? Ugh! Your posts gave me a headache. I deserve to have an offer without you threatening mod reports, calling it inappropiate, and generally just getting REALLY REALLY worked up over nothing.

And if you're going to attack my offer, be civil about it, for god's sake. PHPcoder criticized my offer, but didn't degrade to the levels of the three previously named persons.

(When I say semi-serious, what's wrong with it? I WILL take unwanted customers, as long as they aren't doing bad bad stuff or anything. It's semi-serious because of all these people coming in being jokey-jokey. (I don't mind that jokey-jokey, btw)(i think semi-serious is good enough without an explanation, but apparently ckpeter does not. there you go.))

Appletreats, after reading your post, it appears that you also need to calm down and take the things I said lightly.

I don't mean to insult you or attack you personally. You have my unconditional public apology if I did appear so. My intention was simply to get to know your offer better (specificially why you thought it could work).

Before going back on-topic (which is what I want afterall), I want to address a few things addressed to me in the previous threads. 1) I don't think posting jokes in the advertisement forum is appropriate. True, humor is one of the best things in life, but that's what the lounge forum is for. Humor is necessary in any discussion. I am just not sure if a thread started as a joke should be in the ad forum. (please note that because appletreats has said that he is serious, then he has every right to post in this forum). 2)Also, I don't pretend to be the "WHT Undercover ModSquad" I am; and we all are. WHT is not just a place run by mods, it is our place, and we all have a part to play in this. 3) I apologize if I gave you a headache, that is just how I write when I am serious (I do have a sense of humor, just not right now).

Now, if you have anything you wish to discuss with me regarding my conduct, please do so through PM. I respect appletreats and I would like to bring this thread back to topic.

I still don't quite understand. There are people who occasionally come out and offer there clients, but they were all asking for compensation (however high or low that amount maybe). Why do you think anyone would take up your offer if they realize all they have to do is just post in the same forum asking for compensation? Am I missing something?

Like I said, all my goal is to either get to know if I missed something, or maybe help appletreats refine his offer. I do not mean to bash/attack/other mal-intention.

Peter

Appletreats, after reading your post, it appears that you also need to calm down and take the things I said lightly.
Well, you did seem a little... agressive? I dunno.

Why think it would work?
You never know what will work unless you try it...

Am I missing something?
See above.

oh yeah and check your pm box :rolleyes:

this thread wants to be closed. i still will accept offers though.

Sorry if I sounded aggressive. You have my apology. I guess I was trying to seek out everything (I usually do this when I am confused).

No offense taken?

Your explanation is perfect. Thanks for resolving my confusion.

Peter

And so ends to the story of, "I will take your unwanted customers"... join us next time.

Thread closed by request.