Ok, so I just get home. It's about 8:00pm, so you know what that means: time for telemarketers.

phone> *ring*
me> Checking caller id...it says, "unknown", so who knows? It's a 50/50 shot I'm going to want to talk to the person on the other end, so I answer it.
me> "hello?"
BS> "Hello, Mr. Bratley?" (It's Bradley, but I gave up long ago)
me> "Uh, yeah"
BS> "This is Tina calling on behalf of Bell South."
me> mmhmm
BS> "We're calling all of our caller id customers today to tell them about a great new feature that will filter out unwanted calls. What this means to you is that, with this new service, anyone that calls without letting you know who it is will be blocked."
me> "You mean if they don't show up on caller id, then they will be blocked?"
BS> "That's right!"
me> "So, you mean people like you?"
BS> Long pause.................
me> "What I'm saying is that you just called me, deliberately disguising your information, to sell me a service that would FOREVER prevent you from calling me again"
BS> Umm (unbelievable...she STILL doesn't get it)
me> (totally out of patience) "I just don't think I'm interested"
BS> "But what I'm saying, is, that this will filter out unwanted calls"
me> "But this IS an unwanted call"
BS> "Well, I mean AFTER this call, you'll never get another unwanted call."
me> "#&%*$^^!"
me> *click*

LOL I did the same thing with Ameritech the other night...:emlaugh:

It's called Privacy Manager for $6.95 more per month....

Originally posted by sbrad
me> "What I'm saying is that you just called me, deliberately disguising your information, to sell me a service that would FOREVER prevent you from calling me again"


Great stuff. :) Thanks for that.

Gary

Originally posted by sbrad
me> Checking caller id...it says, "unknown", so who knows? It's a 50/50 shot I'm going to want to talk to the person on the other end, so I answer it. Really? On my home phone, I'd say it's about a 1 in 100 chance that it's someone I want to talk to. So I never answer them.
BS> Umm (unbelievable...she STILL doesn't get it) Doesn't matter if she gets it or not. "Tina" doesn't get to tell you what she thinks, she gets to give you the answers that a staff has developed for every concievable question or objection. You shouldn't think that, by the time Tina called you, your objection "but that would mean you couldn't call me" hadn't come up either early in conceptualizing the campaign for the product or very early in test calling. And probably the solution found to that objection was simply to ignore it.

Tina, by the way, doesn't work for Bell South; she works for a telemarketing firm that has a contract with them. She probably sees the irony, too, in selling a product that will be a barrier to her employers future operations. While she's on the job, though, she won't even notice the difference if you or anyone else is using Privacy Manager... the predictive dialing system she's logged onto will treat those calls the same way it does a busy signal or an operator intercept -- log the result and go on to the next call, without bothering Tina or anyone else.

>>>>RING RING<<<<<<

me> Hello?
other line> 2-second pause *click*
other line> May I speak to the (mispronounced name no one calls me by anymore)
me> 2-second pause *click*

:D

sbrad, yes I've gotten that one too. Very funny.

I don't have this problem. Any calls on my home phone are for my kids. I've got 3 teenagers. My 5 year old, my wife, and I don't get calls, so who needs caller ID?

I feel sorry for the person calling you. You know they're just doing they're job.

I used to be a customer service operator once and I kinda know what telemarketers go through (that's why I'll never want to be a telemarketer nor do I ever want a call from them).

Originally posted by dragonhawk
I feel sorry for the person calling you. You know they're just doing they're job.

I used to be a customer service operator once and I kinda know what telemarketers go through (that's why I'll never want to be a telemarketer nor do I ever want a call from them).

I agree. I was in telemarketing for a couple of months ( I couldn't have lasted any longer ) and it was one of the worst things I have ever had to do. However, I have since then gained a respect for telemarketers. I am no longer rude and try to be as polite as possible and tell them Im not interested. If they get to pushy.. thats when you push back. Its incredible how something some can say over the phone can just send you into a aweful mood. They are just doing there job.

I suspect people react this way to telemarketers just as they react badly to spammers because they feel that this is an intrusion into their space.

(Just a feeble attempt at pop psychology. :) )

This one gets them... I love pranking the CALLER

them> Hello, Mr. CPalfwafs odfa wah wah wah?
me> I think you have the wrong number, did you mean Capobianco?
them> Thats it... Would you be interested in changing your long distance plan?
me> Well I was just about to commit suicide, I have no reason for long distance.... Unless you could talk me out of it

It turns into loads of fun, I'll record the next one I do and play it on WHR.

If you find fun in the pretense of committing suicide, please don't share that with us....

i used to work for a corporation that is one of the largest telemarketers in the world
and just one thing i always found awfull was lets say you were offered something and said no thanks i dont need it if they did not respond to you with like well sir i understand but its a great deal and just let that sale go they could loose there job. i understand its a sale pitch but i always felt the way they handled those things were wrong

If you find fun in the pretense of committing suicide, please don't share that with us....
I thought it was funny.
If you ever record it, I wanna hear it.

Originally posted by 9onlinehost
i if they did not respond to you with like well sir i understand but its a great deal and just let that sale go they could loose there job. It's kind of funny that they all use such a similar structure. A few months ago (back when I used to answer "unidentified" calls) I had a pattern: the telemarketer would make the initial pitch, I'd respond "I'm really not interested in that, thanks," and they'd invariably reply "I can understand you not wanting to make a decision right away, but..." and go into whatever the proscribed response was. And I'd interrupt with "Now what has you thinking I don't want to make a decision right away? I have made a decision, and I thought I gave you that decision very clearly: I'm not interested. That is my decision."

Anyway, on the topic of attempting to frustrate a telemarketer with your own pranks of suicide or whatever: if you're able to get anyone flustered with that kind of stuff, you're really got a telemarketing newbie on your hands. Remember, these people are making calls for 20, 30, 40 hours a week. They've heard it all. And there's an unlimited (to coin a phrase) number of calls to make; your call is completely insignificant to any experienced telemarketer -- at best you might leave them chuckling about it in the break room recounting the story, but more likely they'll forget about as soon as they hear the next beep in their headset.

Originally posted by sbrad
Ok, so I just get home. It's about 8:00pm, so you know what that means: time for telemarketers.

phone> *ring*
me> Checking caller id...it says, "unknown", so who knows? It's a 50/50 shot I'm going to want to talk to the person on the other end, so I answer it.
me> "hello?"
BS> "Hello, Mr. Bratley?" (It's Bradley, but I gave up long ago)
me> "Uh, yeah"
BS> "This is Tina calling on behalf of Bell South."
me> mmhmm
BS> "We're calling all of our caller id customers today to tell them about a great new feature that will filter out unwanted calls. What this means to you is that, with this new service, anyone that calls without letting you know who it is will be blocked."
me> "You mean if they don't show up on caller id, then they will be blocked?"
BS> "That's right!"
me> "So, you mean people like you?"
BS> Long pause.................
me> "What I'm saying is that you just called me, deliberately disguising your information, to sell me a service that would FOREVER prevent you from calling me again"
BS> Umm (unbelievable...she STILL doesn't get it)
me> (totally out of patience) "I just don't think I'm interested"
BS> "But what I'm saying, is, that this will filter out unwanted calls"
me> "But this IS an unwanted call"
BS> "Well, I mean AFTER this call, you'll never get another unwanted call."
me> "#&%*$^^!"
me> *click*

Here in verizon country it's called call intercept. I signed up for it and it does a pretty good job. If caller ID is blocked, they are asked to record their name, and you can establish a PIN to be entered by trusted callers. I have not gotten any long distance or newspaper pitches in a while.

I got my favorite the other night.

"you've been selected to enter our national sweepstakes, someone has to win that $50,000 Mr Harris and I hope it's you!"

"me too!!!!!!"<knowing what's coming>

"would you mind taking a minute and telling us a bit about yourself"

"why sure!"

"what are some of your hobbies?"

"uhm, fishing, reading" (I don't mention keeping telemarketers on the line as long as possible as a passtime but I probably should).

"well as part of our blah blah" (I can't remember this crap word for word) "we're going to send you 3 FREE magazines!!!"

"free is good" (hahaah ahaa oh yeah RIGHT, gimme the pitch baby!!"

"and the fourth magazine blah blah weekly" (the list of magazines are TAILOR MADE for the hobbies I listed, IMAGINE THAT) "only requires you pay for the weekly shipping"

"oh so how much is that?" (hahaha here it comes I knew it)

"Just 3 dollars and 83 cents per week, that's less than 4 dollars"

"hmm, ok now these magazines, what do you reckon a subscription would cost? Last time I ordered outdoor life it was like $19.99 a year, is that about right? and reader's digest, that's like $24.99 a year ain't it?"

"yes sir! but we're giving them to you for FREEEEEEEEE"

"hmm, do you got a calculator handy?"

"uhm, no"

"luckily I do, let's see, $3.83 per week, how many weeks are in a year? 52 ain't it?"

"yes sir, 52 weeks!!!!"

"hmm ok 52 times 3.83, is $199.16 per year I will pay for these free magazines"

"uhm..." (frantically searching for canned response to this)

"and we've already established that I could order these magazines NOT FOR FREE for about $20-$30 PER YEAR each, right"

"uhm..." (nothing found, uhm is the response I guess)

"so if I just went to Wal Mart and picked up a copy of all these magazines and sent in the little cards with a check, these would probably cost me roughly, give or take, a hundred bucks to just buy outright"

"uhm... but we're giving them to you for free"

"darling let me tell ya, if I want some damned magazines, I'll order them and pay for them and save some money and to top it all off, I won't have to put up with ******** calling me on the phone trying to sell me free magazines at a 200-300% markup over what I'd pay if I weren't getting them free, now honestly do you think I want your free magazines now? really do you?"

"uhm"

"and you just spent about 10 minutes on the phone with me, good luck with your quota, good bye"

Talk slow, long pauses, use any trick you can to keep them ON THE PHONE. While they're talking to you, they're not calling the next guy. The only thing that really pisses them off is wasting their time, as they will miss quota and be looking for a job.

Do I care? No. Get a real job, McDonald's is always hiring and at least people don't hate fry cooks.

Unless I'm really busy, I make a game out of "waste the telemarketers time" bonus points for getting them pissed, or making them hang up on me. I know I've done good when my wife feels sorry for them after they finally hang up on me (I never hang up on them).

lol... I needed that luagh! Thanks!
Sometimes I almost wish I had people like that phoning me...