I recently had a new computer, with... yah a new KEYBOARD!!!.

Now, there is a key named 'Turbo' on it. Does anyone have any clues on what it is supposed to do??

The box says something like: 'When pressed with a control key, the cursor speed changes' or similar.

Now... you press it... nothing happen! (nifty hey?)

I was wondering if anyone had any practical solutions to it? (taping it to the shift key maybe?)

It is located right under the [enter], between the right [shift] and the arrows.

I wish I had one of those. I'd certainly want to be able to change my cursing speed at will, just with a button-push. That would be really cool.

See, sometimes I curse too slowly, and people don't get pissed off enough...

Haa, I knew etLux would be all over this one!!

Geez... I'm sorry, really, but I just can't help myself. I start typing a response, fully intending to be erudite and helpful in my reply, and -- wham! -- suddenly I'm overcome by an overwhelming attack of smart-assedness...

Don`t get me wrong, I appreciate the humor.

Actually the turbo key was first made for the older computers that had a variable clock speed, like on the 486 dx266 you could change it to 33 w/ that button.

I think what it's intended for now is to control how fast the cursor blinks (or how fast it moves when you type stuff).

I'd try the other special keys besides <Ctrl> and see what happens. You never know. You could do something cool like overclock your keyboard and find the front-side bus in your monitor. :)

And etLux, as it pertains to your ability to be a smartass, I have to say that your unique brand of inciteful observation tempered with sarcasm makes the hairs on my arms stand straight and salute you in a gesture of respect.

yeah, I remeber that, we used to have to turn turbo off to play some games .. hehe .. ASCII games

Originally posted by cbaker17
Actually the turbo key was first made for the older computers that had a variable clock speed, like on the 486 dx266 you could change it to 33 w/ that button.

heh, but that was on teh computer itself, not on the keyboard... which was probably designed in the p2 age where there were no 'turbo' anyway :)

keep turbo & hit any key... nothign happen at all.

I guess some ddesigner guy had to make something for his pay and thought of that.

I would have appreciated a f**k-it! key instead though :) (makes windows crash to linux)

Maybe it's just a reaaaally old keyboard... lol.

Or maybe the computers are just to fast for some people .. with .. problems :D

and they need to make it slower ;)

Originally posted by Félix C.Courtemanche

I would have appreciated a f**k-it! key instead though :) (makes windows crash to linux) [/B]

Yeah, you would think with all them F keys up at the top, they'd have an F U key. Think of the applications! You could tell chatroom idiots where to go, counterspam your spam emails, flame a website with no purpose, and many more!

If you notice your CPU box, atleast some of them, have a little turbo button, next to the reset or power ones. I guess, they just shifted the turbo one of the CPU and onto the keyboard so some lazy butts dun have to bend down or stand up and adjust there clock speed. :)

I have found out the definitive answer to this.

Apparently, Felix has misread his keyboard.

The key in question does NOT say TURBO -- but, rather, TURNIP... and, in fact, it isn't connected to a computer, at all.

This is actually one of those new "Internet Appliances" we've been hearing so much about -- in this case, a genuine, brand new, Internet food blender.

So far, they only work with RUTABAGAS. However, as there was inadequate space on the key face to print all that, they simply put... TURNIP.

hehe :D :D

You laugh now... but wait until the new Internet pay-toilets come out.

Originally posted by etLux
You laugh now... but wait until the new Internet pay-toilets come out.



:bawling: Booo hoooo... :bawling: I thought they were gonna be free!! :( :(

Free with unlimited Flushes?

THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS UNLIMITED!!!

Ohhhh sorry- were we talking about toilets? Actually a toilet is a good analogy for bandwidth. You can only eat so much Taco Bell... nevermind.

Ok ... How about a burstable pipe? it can get very busy on fridays and saturdays.

Thats a good idea, but its yet free right??

Originally posted by Technics
Free with unlimited Flushes?

I don't know if you've noticed, but WHT has already installed the Internet pay-toilets on this site.

Now, if you ain't got a dime, well... you have to go out back behind the Ad Offers category and pee in the petunias.

sick ... all of you

Originally posted by CRego3D
sick ... all of you


hehe.. ok ok.. we wont charge you Carlos :D

This thread is getting 'way off track.

Weren't we talking about the TURNIP key on Felix's new Internet food blender?

ummm umm... I think so.. I dunno.. I was busy trying to get my dime out of the toilet.

You're supposed to put it in the slot by the door, Kunal.

Roll up yer sleeves, now...

hehe.. I dint mean it literaly etLux, I meant I was trying to act sneaky and remove the coin from the slot. lol

Nasty. Nasty nasty nasty ppl :stickout

Originally posted by BC
Nasty. Nasty nasty nasty ppl :stickout

You should talk, Chicken. It was your inconsiderate new pay-toilet idea that forced Kunal to such vulgar depths.

Shame on you!

I beg your pardon! *puffs chest out* It was not me who put the pay toilets in. It was another administration member who put it in.

Shame on you for accusing an innocent person for implementing such an idea.

Sorry but i'll never pay to piss.....

The capability of human beings to switch from unrelated subject to unrelated subject is quite amazing :)

Originally posted by Félix C.Courtemanche
The capability of human beings to switch from unrelated subject to unrelated subject is quite amazing :)

That's silly. This is all directly to topic.

Let me recap.

The initial inquiry was about a TURBO key.

It was subsequently determined that the posting party had misread his keyboard, and that it was actually a TURNIP key.

In that the consumption of TURNIPS typically requires one to visit a toilet at significantly higher intervals than normal, the highly relevant subject of personal elimination facilities came to the fore.

It was thereby noted that, in a bald-faced grab for the nickels and dimes of the poor, CHICKEN has instituted pay-toilets on WHT to take advantage of the excessive consumption of TURNIPS by WHT members.

What I see, here, is a cogent, consistent train of thought throughout this post.

Originally posted by etLux
What I see, here, is a cogent, consistent train of thought throughout this post.


I see a blatant advertisement for turbo keyboards, pay toilets, and Farmer Brown's fresh produce. It's COMBINATION SPAM I TELLS YA!!!!! Next thing ya know, there will be banner ads promoting freshturnip.com, abuckaflush.net, and typereallyfast.org. And when it happens, don't say I didn't warn yas all.