I'll start with one I just made up actually happened to me.. sadly.), and everyone adds one or two.


You know you're a nerd when:
...Someone gives you their phone number and you think it's their IP.

The other day I said "LOL" out loud to someone instead of laughing.

I am ashamed of myself.

:rofl:

WOW... you said LOL out loud ?? You're realllyyy a nerd. I actually like LOL over HAHAHA.

You know you're a nerd when....someone asks your name and you respond with your IRC nick

Originally posted by ats-tech
You know you're a nerd when....someone asks your name and you respond with your IRC nick

:rofl:

I've always known I was a nerd but I certainly resemble this remark! I've been using this nick for so many years now that sometimes I forget my real name!

And yes.. Often people who have known me for years still reffer to me as my nick.


V Just to remind myself my real name is down there V

Your real name is Mrs. O'Leary? :D

oo oo let me:

1. Your stationery is more cluttered than Warren Beatty's address book. The letterhead lists a fax number, e-mail addresses for two on-line services, and your Internet address, which spreads across the breadth of the letterhead and continues to the back. In essence, you have conceded that the first page of any letter you write is letterhead.

2. You have never sat through an entire movie without having at least one device on your body beep or buzz.

3. You need to fill out a form that must be typewritten, but you can't because there isn't one typewriter in your house -- only computers with laser printers.

4. You think of the gadgets in your office as "friends," but you forget to send your father a birthday card.

5. You disdain people who use low baud rates.

6. When you go into a computer store, you eavesdrop on a salesperson talking with customers -- and you butt in to correct him and spend the next twenty minutes answering the customers' questions, while the salesperson stands by silently, nodding his head.

7. You use the phrase "digital compression" in a conversation without thinking how strange your mouth feels when you say it.

8. You constantly find yourself in groups of people to whom you say the phrase "digital compression." Everyone understands what you mean, and you are not surprised or disappointed that you don't have to explain it.

9. You know Bill Gates' e-mail address, but you have to look up your own social security number.

10. You stop saying "phone number" and replace it with "voice number," since we all know the majority of phone lines in any house are plugged into contraptions that talk to other contraptions.

11. You sign Christmas cards by putting :-) next to your signature.

12. Off the top of your head, you can think of nineteen keystroke symbols that are far more clever than :-).

13. You back up your data every day.

14. Your wife asks you to pick up some minipads for her at the store and you return with a rest for your mouse.

15. You think jokes about being unable to program a VCR are stupid.

16. On vacation, you are reading a computer manual and turning the pages faster than everyone else who is reading John Grisham novels.

17. The thought that a CD could refer to finance or music rarely enters your mind.

18. You are able to argue persuasively the Ross Perot's phrase "electronic town hall" makes more sense than the term "information superhighway," but you don't because, after all, the man still uses hand-drawn pie charts.

19. You go to computer trade shows and map out your path of the exhibit hall in advance. But you cannot give someone directions to your house without looking up the street names.

20. You would rather get more dots per inch than miles per gallon.

21. You become upset when a person calls you on the phone to sell you something, but you think it's okay for a computer to call and demand that you start pushing buttons on your telephone to receive more information about the product it is selling.

22. You know without a doubt that disks come in five-and-a- quarter-and three-and-a-half-inch sizes.

23. Al Gore strikes you as an "intriguing" fellow.

24. You own a set of itty-bitty screw-drivers and you actually know where they are.

25. While contemporaries swap stories about their recent hernia surgeries, you compare mouse-induced index-finger strain with a nine-year-old.

26. You are so knowledgeable about technology that you feel secure enough to say "I don't know" when someone asks you a technology question instead of feeling compelled to make something up.

27. You rotate your screen savers more frequently than your automobile tires.

28. You have a functioning home copier machine, but every toaster you own turns bread into charcoal.

29. You have ended friendships because of irreconcilably different opinions about which is better -- the track ball or the track pad.

30. You understand all the jokes in this message. If so, my friend, technology has taken over your life. We suggest, for your own good, that you go lie under a tree and write a haiku. And don't use a laptop.

Sorry for hogging this thread.. but I found some more:

...when asked about a bus schedule, you wonder if it is 16 or 32 bits.

...when you are counting objects, you go "0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D...".

...you dream in 256 pallettes of 256 colors.

...your wife says "If you don't turn off that damn machine and come to bed, then I am going to divorce you!", and you chastise her for for omitting the "else" clause.

...you try to sleep, and think:
sleep(8 * 3600); /* sleep for 8 hours /

...you are reading a book and look for the scroll bar to get to the next page.

...after fooling around all day with routers etc, you pick up the phone and start dialing an IP number...

...you get in the elevator and double-click the button for the floor you want.

...not only do you check your email more often than your paper mail, but you remember your network address faster than your postal one.

...you look for a icon to double-click to
open your bedroom window.

...you go to balance your checkbook and discover that you're doing the math in octal.

...you look for a trash can icon for throwing garbage.

Originally posted by ats-tech
Your real name is Mrs. O'Leary? :D

Oh Stop! Now you've got me confused! :confused:

26. You are so knowledgeable about technology that you feel secure enough to say "I don't know" when someone asks you a technology question instead of feeling compelled to make something up.


Haha this is my favorite.

Hehe, i agree iwth the 26 from Dixiesys

Sadly enoguh i "speak l33t" with my friends, like, we use alot of gaming terms, mainly the korean words Gosu chobo and hasu...
we also say HAX! when someone gets hurt or maimed, wtf mates...
stuff like that.

...when you can look at a nest of wiring and know where it all goes.

Haha, most of those apply to me, hehe, but I mean come on... are there actually people who can't program a VCR?

Originally posted by Xshare
Haha, most of those apply to me, hehe, but I mean come on... are there actually people who can't program a VCR?

Yip.. my wife's parents.. VCR and microwave! We have to set for them... pity we only see them once or twice a year...

Wow. Hehe, I find myself almost mentioning inside jokes I have with the guys I talk to on IRC, to people in real life. I gotta catch myself at times, hehe.

Originally posted by Xshare
Haha, most of those apply to me, hehe, but I mean come on... are there actually people who can't program a VCR?

You know you're a nerd when you say "what VCR?"

Actually mine's a combo DVD/VCR and it sets itself by using the time sync signals from APT :D

Yea... I can barely afford a new computer. Hell.. I can't afford a new computer (I'm still on a 1Ghz piece of crap... I guess that lowers my nerd value... or raises it because I need a better comp than that... whatever).

So Yea... I still use a VCR.. but I mean COME ON! The instructions are on the friggen screen!

- when you spend $300 for a computer upgrade without even blinking an eye, but $300 for a set of tires on your car makes you mad.

- you can add up how much you spent for your car and how much you spent for the computer(s) on your desk and the computer wins.

These are all true for me

Originally posted by Dixiesys
- when you spend $300 for a computer upgrade without even blinking an eye, but $300 for a set of tires on your car makes you mad.

- you can add up how much you spent for your car and how much you spent for the computer(s) on your desk and the computer wins.

These are all true for me

Sadly that's true for me as well.

Like I said earlier, hehe, I WISH that was true for me.

glad you said computer (s) :D
Plus laptops, wireless LAN etc etc....

ouch don't even want to think about it...
NERD!

There were times when your computers, laptops and servers cost more than your car does.. :)

ML

Originally posted by Xshare
Yea... I can barely afford a new computer. Hell.. I can't afford a new computer (I'm still on a 1Ghz piece of crap...
I feel your pain .
My home computer has to run opencase because closed case it overheats :-( (if only I had the money fo fix it .... all money goes to business now) .

Originally posted by nmluan
There were times when your computers, laptops and servers cost more than your car does.. :)

ML
On that note : I dont have a car and this isnt so much of a problem as my overheating computer :-)
NERD++

you know you're a nerd when your girlfriend is trying to talk about serious matters with you and you keep copy pasting these jokes to her and cracking up...

Regards,
Patrick